
In the interest of full disclosure, I must mention that I have only tried Grandstand Garlic flavor. Based on its unequivocal awesomeness, however, I am prepared to recommend the entire line.
I discovered Vivi's at Central Market. They had it out to sample with pretzel sticks, which was smart, because I don't think anyone would have bought it otherwise. It's too weird, it's too whimsical, and it fits no known condiment category.
First of all, it is kind of mis-billed. It sure doesn't taste like mustard. At least not primarily like mustard. It is hot and sweet and spicy and salty, and it goes through several flavor phases on the tongue. It is deeply strange, but also deeply comforting and familiar. It is a very American flavor -- it embodies all the flavors that Americans love except greasy; Vivi's is only 15 calories per tablespoon. I tasted this stuff, did not buy it at the time for a number of stupid reasons, and obsessed about it for 48 straight hours. Then I brought some home.
Ceej and I spent a good while trying to figure out what it tastes like. I was reminded of Denis Leary's bit about the Green Death flavored NyQuil, except Vivi's does not put one in a coma, unless you mean a happy coma of awesome. We were totally unable to describe it, and finally decided that "happy coma of awesome" was as close as we were going to get. By then we had eaten a quarter of the jar.
So what do you do with it? The answer is everything. I have yet to make a sandwich which Vivi's does not enhance tremendously. It is lovely with turkey and it is lovely with egg salad. It would be lovely with a veggie hero, with grilled eggplant and red pepper. I have not tried this yet, but I am 100% confident that it would make the kind of cheater chicken marinade that makes your guests think you have a Michelin-starred chef stashed in your hall closet. Ooh, and pork chops too! And tofu! And anything kind of blandish that needs perking up. It cozies up to herbs wonderfully; it gets along well with dill and mint and basil and parsley. I would also dip crudites in it, and French fries if you are not on a Diet, and potato chips. You could goose your meatloaf and burgers with it, and I think you should. The possibilities are truly endless.
I am pretty sure that at some point tonight I will find myself in the kitchen with the refrigerator door open, shoveling Grandstand Garlic Carnival Mustard into my face with wild abandon. Ah, Vivi. I have no idea who you are, but I think I love you.
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